ROSS RUSHIN: IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY

One of our Florida sales reps Becky sent out a note to remind us all that it is Ross's birthday today. She is now 25 years old.

Apparently, she was trying to keep it hush hush. So I thought I would quietly post it on my blog here.

Since I can't actually be with you to celebrate today Ross, I thought I would post a commemorative picture for you. The ultimate 25th birthday celebration comes in the form of the My Little Pony 25th Birthday Celebration Retro Ponies™



I hope you enjoy this very special day, when the act of parental horizontal mambo led to the world being graced with your presence.

Creativity Lacking

Ho hum. I am in a rut of some consideration. I've got a brand spankin' new camera (a Canon 40D which is ace), a fancy new lens (Canon 17-40 f/4.0 ultra wide zoom), and absolutely zero skill or motivation to go shoot anything. I've been thumbing through my Flickr contacts and am once again humbled by the amazing talent that lies within amateur photographers who do astonishing things with equipment that isn't as 'fancy' as what I've just upgraded myself to.

Today, I picked up another basket that I started before New Year's that I affectionately dubbed 'The Thing'. I didn't have a plan in mind for it, nor did I really know what it was going to be. It began with some scraps that were leftover from my other basket project. I figured it would decide for itself what it would be. At this point it's looking like a pen holder, or something.

I've always had this fascination with things that are artsy, or colorful, or creative. I was not blessed in the creativity department. It oozes from the pores of my sister and my niece. My sister can take a piece of jewelry made with wires and beads and replicate it in about oh, 15 minutes. The things my niece has been able to do since before she hit puberty are mind blowing. I looked at this book that she had assembled from her art class this year and it is beautiful in both it's simplicity and it's skill.

Meanwhile, I sit around and try and force something cool out of things I see. It's to the point now where I can't even tell what would make a nice composition anymore. It all feels so forced and contrived. I know I should just go out and shoot things. I guess I just feel that I can only shoot so many trees in the woods or patchworks of snow with winding rivers. It's not that there isn't a shedload of beauty around me, I just can't seem to find a way to capture it that's worth looking at right now.

Perhaps this is the photographic equivalent of writer's block. The notion that I might snap out of it doesn't really relieve the larger problem of having no skills, GOSH!

One Thousand Six Hundred and Seventy-One

1,671.

Miles.

Driven.

Two hours of sleep total.

North Platte, Nebraska to Henniker, New Hampshire.

Sort of by accident, see.

I didn't set out to drive all night. The circumstances were such that it just sort of happened that way. Let me back up. After a frenzy of packing and loading the trailer on Tuesday afternoon, following one last round of recycling and Salvation Armying, I left Boulder (insert dramatic music here) FOREVER at 4pm. Ok, so not really forever. I'm sure I'll find my way back there at some point.

Anyhoo...I had it in mind that I would drive a ways just to start cutting into the big trip. As Simon pointed out, 10% of the trip now is 10% less tomorrow. I figured North Platte would be a good destination. It was a reasonable distance away, and had plenty of amenities. My mom asked if I shed any tears when I left. The answer is no. I had zero emotional attachment to Boulder. That is what bums me out about it. It's such an aesthetically beautiful place that is unfortunately filled with very shallow people. Perhaps I just never met the right crowd. I'll never know and now, I don't really care. I will miss my ace housemate Allison, though. She really did make it bearable.

Mother Nature gave me quite a sendoff as well. I woke on Tuesday morning to rafter shaking winds which wanted to blow me off the highway all the way across the State line. I should have seen it as a sign of things to come. After waking in North Platte to overcast skies I set off along the road that would be keeping me company through many states, Interstate 80.

About oh, 10 miles into the trip I hit a little snow squall. Nothing significant, save for the fact that it didn't stop until about 500 MILES LATER! Yes, all the way across the rest of Nebraska and all the way across Iowa it was snowing. At one point I hit a patch of black ice that started the trailer fishtailing. A 16 foot trailer that might be ever so slightly overloaded is a lot of weight for the little Touareg to handle. I don't know how I managed to hold it together and keep it on the road. I was convinced that I was going to head off, but good kharma was with me and I righted my direction and stayed on the tarmac.

My nerves were shot to hell. I started questioning my choice to make the trip. I scolded myself for letting my overwhelming desire to be here take over my better judgement. I had Laura Bontrager's voice ringing in my head telling me to 'Make Good Choices', and thought that this time I probably hadn't. I was mad at the weather. I was mad at the road. I was mad at myself. I was mad at January and trailers and people who do stupid things like moving in the winter with trailers that don't like anything other than perfectly dry pavement.

My sister took the brunt of this frustration. I needed to know what was ahead of me. She's my weather guide and had to deal with me being short and blunt trying to figure out how much longer I was going to have to deal with this storm. I wanted to know exactly when it was going to stop. Exactly when I was going to have some relief. I wanted dry pavement. Never in my life have I wanted dry pavement so badly. Why didn't I stop?

The trouble with stopping in the middle of this mess was that I would just have to wake up to it again and keep slogging through. I wanted to get ahead of the storm and clear into what I had seen as a window of nice weather before the next storm hit New England. I finally got a break around Davenport, Iowa. By then I had resolved that if I made it that far, I was just going to continue on through Chicago.

I am not a fan of Chicago (a whole other story). The thing that annoys me the most about it is the deplorable state of driving there. And rush hour. I knew that if I stopped before Chicago that I would be fighting traffic all the way through Indiana. The best time to get around there is later at night, so I kept going.

When I was through Gary, Indiana I wasn't sleepy. When I was through South Bend I was wide awake. My motivation had returned, and I didn't stop until Toledo. Finally at 3am, I pulled into a highway services and slept for an hour and a half. at 4:30 I was awake again and the anxiousness was back. I set off and drove for a while before stopping for another half hour of sleep. The GyPSy said I was due to arrive at 6:30 and I only had 300 miles to go. That thing must not be working.

Blah blah blah, driving more miles, blahdey blah...is this odometer even MOVING!?!...blah blah...I swear this is the longest 10 miles of MY LIFE!...blah blah oh my gosh this is a very twisty little two lane road in Vermont drivedrivedrive I am never taking the trailer on this road AGAIN! Phone call to sister, text messages I can't reply to, when is the next storm supposed to start? Midnight? I should be ok...drivedrivedrive What do you mean they've moved up the time that the storm is supposed to start!?! Please, please can I just make it safely...blah blah blah Damnit if that stupid GPS wasn't right in the end. How did it KNOW that it would take so long on Vermont route 7??

And I made it. Then:
1) I backed into the driveway at my sister's house
2) Got out of the car
3) Burst into tears

My body still hasn't recovered. But, I'm here and I'm safe and happy. I am not anxious to ever repeat such a feat of driving madness.

Tit dirt!

As I sit here drinking a nice BBB after a frenzy of packing for my move, I'm having an email exchange with my coworker Ross about a table cloth that I thought I remembered sending to her. This stream of consciousness was her response:

"You didn't send it anywhere. I stole it. From Sherie's desk.

I'm gonna FedEx it. I mean seriously, have you really ever tried sending a package at the post office? First of all, good luck finding the godforsaken place. Then you get to stand in line a lot. And then when you get to the front the lady with the poofy red hair won't even look you in the eye and she makes you feel like you're wasting her time even though you're only asking her to DO WHAT MY TAX DOLLARS ARE PAYING HER TO DO. Fuckin' post office. Besides, I can FedEx it when I go to Kinkos to do my expense reports this week. Plus, the friendly faces, well-organized efficient store layout, and user-friendly machines at FedEx Kinkos are a welcome contrast to the US Mail. I think the fact that they have an endangered species as their mascot is a harbinger of doom for the Postal Service."

That was worth posting.

In other news, a man 'miraculously' regained his vision after a trip to the chiropractor. This, is headline news.

So I'm going to have my last day of snowboarding in Colorado tomorrow. Not entirely sure how I feel about that. For the most part, there's not much here I'm going to miss, but every once in a while I get this pang of a reminder about something I'm not going to get to do for a while. I have to keep reminding myself that this isn't the last time I'm going to be here. I am so incredibly anxious to get out of here that only the request of my very good friend Full-hair was enough to get me to give up one day of move preparation for some turns on the slopes. He's a good friend though, and definitely one of those 'things' I'm going to miss. Plus he helped me move some stuff around today, and for that it's worth delaying my departure to spend some time with him.

But, later this week I'll be back on the road and streaking towards my new destination. Woop!

No sheep spotting today, although I did bubble wrap and pack the ace sheep figurine that Dan gave me.

A New Year of Underwater Basket Weaving

Head shown for size reference. Please refrain from suggestions that I have a large noggin.

Yeah, that's right. I know how to weave baskets. You gotta problem with that??

My sister has been doing it for a while and a few years ago she started teaching me how. I've kept it quiet, but now I'm ready to come out of the craft closet and let the world know that I CAN MAKE SOMETHING WITH MY OWN TWO HANDS (and the two hands that belong to my sister, the expert). I am not ashamed. Say what you will. It's actually quite enjoyable and I like the idea of being able to make something functional. So there.


So the one up there is the one that we started the other day. It will hold my wooly hats and gloves once I'm settled in the Northeast.

I'm now in Buffalo, NY on my way to Madison for a few days of meetings. I drove through snow storms all day long. This might have been the toughest day of driving I've ever done.

And this concludes my 'completely unrelated to the New Year' post.

Best of luck to everyone in 2008.

Tis the Season for Completely Changing One's Mind

I'm not moving to Santa Cruz.

There, I've said it. By now this isn't news to most. Nor is my reason for the sweeping change of heart. Something went off in my head. It sort of felt like it built up, but it wasn't until one nearly sleepless night of my mind racing until 2am that the solution came to me.

I know Tim told me that I should live my own life and stop trying to make everyone else happy. I know Simon-and even my own sister- told me that I should go West. But it was the combination of Tori reminding me that unless there really is some huge tectonic shift, California isn't going anywhere, and the Double Fisker reminding me that family is only around for so long that really got this thought rollercoaster started.

So, New Hampshire it is.

I'm happy with the decision. I'm still not happy with all the things I know I'm going to miss about the West. Things that are both work related and personal. No more are my 'stop the car and ride in Fruita and St. George on my way to SoCal' rides. Gone are the consecutive days of riding over to take pictures of surfers in Santa Cruz, followed by delicious meals at the Bontrager house. Seeing the purple mountains majesties in the distance as I drive back to Colorado are at an end. Driving on the straightest roads ever across miles of barren desert are a thing of the past. Don't even get me started on turning my back on dry air in favor of mosquitos and humidity.

But, being in the same town as my sister and driving distance away from my parents seems to me to be worth the trade. I've always said that if I had to live in the East again, it would only be somewhere in New England. The landscape might be smaller than the towering treeless Rocky tops, but New Hampshire is still a year-round recreation spot.

I've been reminded that I'm not just moving away from something. I'm also moving towards many things. I am excited. I'm still dreading the faff that I'm going to have to go through to physically make the move, but the end result is going to be more time with people who really do love me despite my weird quirkiness.

Happy Chrismahanakwanzika to everyone. May whatever holiday you celebrate be full of joy and merriment.

On The Fence

Bit of a gap between posts, but that's primarily due to the fact that since I've been with the fam the last few weeks I've mostly just been taking it easy.

And speaking of being around the fam, herein lies the thing that has given me a reason to post. What usually happens when I spend any amount of time with my sister in New Hampshire, is that I start thinking about how easy it would be to live around here. I've always said that if I had to live in the East again, it would only be up here. The lifestyle compliments me, and it's not the usual het up rat race that is the norm in the Northeast. I guess there's an imaginary line that exists somewhere between New York City and here above which things have different significance in life. Hmm...Perhaps it's not an imaginary line at all, but rather the State line of Massachusetts and every State north of it.

Factor in my parents. They aren't getting any younger, and I do regularly wish I were nearer to them. I'm the only one in my entire family that lives as far West as I do. The next relative that has any great span between themselves and the rest of the family is my cousin who lives in Florida. Everyone else is concentrated between Ohio and New Jersey.

So I sit here and start second guessing whether or not I've made the right choice in going even Westerer than I current am. Every time I'm in California, particularly Santa Cruz, it seems like absolute bliss. I guess I've always harbored some dream about living in California. It's always had this mystique about it, and I've felt like I've missed out on something by not having lived there. I always wondered what it must have been like to grow up there. Maybe my hair would turn blonde by association.

Now I'm here and the perfection that I was looking forward to has been replaced by a malaise over the thought of leaving. I don't like being so far from everyone. I've thought for some time now that a move back East is an eventuality for me. It doesn't seem like any of my family is going west any time soon.

The position to do what I do in the Northeast is open. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't given serious consideration to calling my boss and telling her that I've had a drastic change of heart, and I want to stay here. If only Ohio weren't included in the mix! Terrible drivers in Ohio.

As tempting as it is, I think I would wind up making several people very cranky with me. They would all be friends, and I'm not very interested in losing them. I've made commitments regarding this move and the associated work effort that would not do me well to back out on. I think the best thing to do is to carry on as planned and re-evaluate things this time next year, when I will inevitably be back in New Hampshire for quite some time.

This is one of those times when I wish someone with perfect clarity and the ability to examine a situation from all angles and all possible outcomes would just say "You need to do this". That would be easy.